Ooh, sparkles! Well, I haven't really seen that many pretty twinklings in the sky this bonfire night but it was a Thursday I suppose and doubtless there will be more come the weekend which is now very nearly here. Just one more day at the shop before I can allow myself to crumple into a little heap and ignore the world for a while. Yay! Heh, well I suppose it has been a reasonably busy week even with the town relatively empty after the festivities of the week before. I shall be glad for a little time out anyways, it should allow my brain a moment off from pointlessly expending energy worrying about unnecessary things and, just maybe, try and turn my perspective and attentions to more productive matters.

Anyways, my appointment today with the lady from 'Intraining' turned out ok if largely uninspiring. A fair amount of form-filling was involved with the prospect of a further exciting assessment to come. Do you question the actual usefulness of all this tedious paperwork? Strongly Agree/Agree/Neither Agree nor Disagree... err, well anywho. Hopefully somewhere along the line something good will come out of it. The woman I saw seemed nice enough and I got through it only losing the power of human speech on a couple of occasions. I don't know if she'll have noticed. The sensations of it veritably scream in me when it happens but as to how much of it shows on the surface I really don't know. In this case I had the peculiar sense of the word I was trying to say (or the thought of the word) being almost physically lodged sideways in brain, I could get a hold of it but couldn't it drag it down the pipes. Odd. Still, I don't know whether the way I experience the world is in any way special compared to the way everyone else does. Still, whilst I have no wish for a perfectly trouble free existence, I would just like the sense that I was connected to the world and acting from my own will and choices. Well we'll see, maybe yet they'll teach me new confidence skills and I shall be able to make myself just a little more expressively myself.

For now though, I have a day at the shop to get through. Hopefully that will go reasonably smoothly with no unwanted scary things. Then I might be able to sit down, let my brain process stuffs and try and get it set for the prospect of all this new learnings. Oh, one other interesting thing of note though is apparently I seem to have made some kind of impression at the Coliseum with my swishy web programming skills. I'm told the trustees have been talking about me anyways, though whether that is anything to get particularly excited about it is really rather difficult to tell. Anyways, it just shows I'm not paranoid, people really are talking about me behind my back! Heh. Well, who knows, it would be nice one day to actually find someone who might be willing to actually pay me to do stuff. It would very much be an important step forward in what is ultimately my more important goal, becoming secure in my own value, space and skin.

Well, anywho, I hopes that everyone has themselves a nice weekend in prospect, I look forward to seeing you there...