Now I have no reason to feel nervous now do I? I have a nice family wedding to go to, and I'm pretty sure of every step I need to take for a journey that I have done countless times before. Yet still my nervous system is jumping about, little electric currents running through me, tensing muscles, fluttering butterflies and straining breath and heartrate and so forth. All of which entirely removing any hope of sleep I might have had before my travels. I know there is nothing to be nervous about and yet still physically I am set on edge. I am making some use of those tools and exercise I have to dampen these sensations, and they are having some affect, yet still my brain seeks to scamper about seeking some hook to fix these feelings to, and could go to excessively imaginative lengths in doing so did I not make the effort to rein it in. Presently it seems to be at least confined to but the vaguest ideas and the odd unbidden impulse thought that it wishes it didn't have to go. I wish I didn't feel such pointless things for no good reason. It's not as if it helps me to stop and take a few moments in my preparations, it would just entirely paralyse me to inaction and hiding were I to let it. You'd think it might realise that if it wanted to be safe and happy then this sort of thing be entirely the wrong way of going about it and utterly counterproductive. Ho-hum. Well, hopefully once I get on my way I'm thinking perhaps the familiar rythyms of travelling by train on a route I have taken countless times then my nerves will be suitably reassured and I'll be able to get on with things. I'll be good I think, once I've got going, still I do wish beyond measure that I didn't feel such things, whether in these circumstances or just more generally. Ah well, writing it out helps anyways. I'll be off in a few hours and I'll be ok once on my way. In the meantime hopes everyone else has a most enjoyable weekend and I shall be back again some time on Monday and shall let you all know how it went. Au revoir.